To be Flexible

If someone is too tough or stubborn, one can say that they have a cold heart, or even a heart made of stone. But consider this: our teeth may be hard and rigid, but they will each fall out as we get older. On the other hand, the tongue more or less retains its form even after we die.

In general, things can sustain themselves more easily if they are flexible, but tend to be damaged if they are too rigid.

One time, I assembled a group of practitioners who had been on a six month retreat in the meditation hall and asked, “Have any of you made any progress, or wish to share your meditation experience?”

It is difficult to attain awakening, but after this six month experience with meditation, most people said, “My heart has become softer.” I was very glad to hear such comments. After practicing meditation for a while, one will realize there is no need to argue over petty things, no need to be rigid, and no need to compare with others. One’s heart will become softer and one’s mind will become broader, just as the bough of a tree with ripened fruit bends, or how the branches of a willow tree are beautiful due to their soft and gentle swing.

Truly, the greatest progress you can make in your cultivation is the softening of the heart.

If we regulate the breath, relax the body, and train the mind through meditation, we can gradually rein in and pacify our monkey-like minds and horse-like wills. Our days will be happier and our lives will be longer.

Master Hanshan once said: “The strings of a hard crossbow always break first; the blades of a sharp knife chip more easily.”

The same rule can be applied to live our lives. We should honor harmony and congruence in our relationships. As soon as a fist thrusts forward, it loses power. When the fist remains in, one’s power is sustained. We should never be impulsive in our actions or complain about little things that don’t really matter. Impatience and stubbornness lead us far too easily toward grief and suffering.

We all hope that we can have friends who are peaceful and pleasant, but there may be some who say, “These days, if you aren’t fierce and relentless, others will take advantage of you.” But these kinds of setbacks are temporary.

One may win or lose, but in the end, the result depends on you. One cannot rely simply on brute force, instead it is important to focus on the details. Everyone is different, and if we can be flexible and not so rigid, we can accept this.

Originally published in Endless Knot, written by Venerable Master Hsing Yun.

Image from Pixabay.

More Featured Articles

We all have our share of headaches and heartaches. Physically, we all have to face aging, sickness and death. Mentally, we have to deal with problems arising from greed, hatred and ignorance. The Chinese have a saying that aptly describes our predicament: “Heaven and hell sometimes end; the threads of sorrow continue forever.” Our afflictions are as deep as the dark blue sea and are Read more
In fact, what I have enjoyed the most in my reading, and it could be said that a piece of writing that has had an important influence upon my life is the poem “Thoughts on My Fiftieth Birthday,” written by Venerable Master Taixu during his visit to India when the lay Buddhist Tan Yun-shan, Chairperson of the Institute of Chinese Language and Culture at Visva-Bharati Read more
If your mind is in balance, what need is there to work at morality? If your behavior is correct, what use is meditation to you? If you understand mercy, then you will naturally care for your parents. If you understand faithful conduct, then all of society will be in order.—Platform Sutra of the Sixth PatriarchA Balanced MindMental balance results from understanding that self-respect is a Read more
On the path of life, sometimes we need to go straight ahead, other times we have to make turns in order to reach our goals. If we do not turn around when we need to, we will not “see the other shore.” But when we need to move ahead and we do not, we will miss a prime opportunity. When we have to make a Read more
People suffer from a variety of diseases of the mind, such as being greedy, judgmental, or quick to anger. The Great Perfection of Wisdom Sutra says, “There are four kinds of diseases of the body, which are due to excessive wind, heat, phlegm, or other causes. There are also four kinds of diseases of the mind, which are greed, anger, ignorance, and pride.” Truthfully, it Read more
Sharing joy with others is not only a virtue, it is also a delightful experience.To take delight in shared joy is to give willing support to those who are compassionate in helping the needy; it is to give genuine praise to those who have dedicated themselves to the highest achievements in life. If we want to be successful in this world, we must cultivate the Read more
Many of us think that after undertaking the precepts life will become a matter of you-can’t-do-this and you-can’t-do-that. We wonder if that isn’t limiting us even more. We worry that it will mean a loss of freedom. This is why some people will question: Why should I receive the precepts and end up just limiting myself!In fact, if we were to go to a prison Read more
It is only through loving-kindness and compassion that we can find room in our hearts to forgive others. It is only through our willingness to let go of resentment that we can find a way to magnanimity.  Read more
What we often care most for in life is the self, and the most important aspect of self is none other than destiny. During one's lifetime, destiny changes frequently because of circumstances that arise. Because of a person, an event, a word, a dollar, or even a thought, entire lives may be altered. Similarly, the development of a country may be changed and the history Read more
I once copied out a sutra in blood by pricking myself, and once I also burned my arm as an offering. I once remained silent for a year without speaking, and once I also kept my eyes closed for three months without seeing. Later on, I would occasionally open my eyes and suddenly feel: Oh, there are still verdant mountains; there are still trees; the Read more
Life is the most precious thing in the world, so it is imperative that we respect it in all its forms. Not only must we have regard for human life, we must also respect animal life and the life of any organism in our ecosystem. The worst offense a person can ever commit is to violate the life of others, or even to cause harm Read more
The first realization of The Eight Realizations of a Bodhisatttva Sutra is concerned with what is generally called the Buddha’s view of this world. This first realization is a description of the basic features of the world we live in. The points made in this realization are made in many other Buddhist sutras.The Buddha emphasized these basic points on many different occasions because it is Read more